Reading someone's else's blog www.tonianderson.blogspot.com I searched my archives for archive 23, sentence 5 and found this

Because I know I want to make a success out of writing and the only way to be a success at it is to keep writing

that about sums up my epiphany moment...that in order to have some success I need to keep writing and eventually my time will come.

Work...

well I know that is what I am supposed to be doing....does going through all my email count....well I suppose it does in a way because I belong to some great writer's groups and research groups and often find stuff to download and put into my research folder because I never know when I might need to use them...also found a directory for online newspapers which I love to read...great inspiration in them not necessarily for a huge story outline but a subplot or a character idea...
I feel really inspired to work so need to get on with it....I want to make a success out of my writing life and the only way I am going to do that is by writing...

I've had a few days off....

to celebrate Christmas and recover from it :) but am back in working mode...well will be after today when I have a hundred and one....okay a thousand and two emails to go through....from friends and writer's groups and then tomorrow I will be back..doing some prep work on the story I want to write....not sure yet who's it will be...have a couple in mind and need to work out which I am happiest with!!!!! Will be looking forward to keeping an up to date journal of my writing progress

MERRY CHRISTMAS

Hope everyone has a wonderful Christmas, or a happy whatever you celebrate and a wonderful New Year with lots of stories to tell and people to make happy

Writing....

mmmm difficult at the moment....a friend died this week....someone who had great faith in everyone she knew...was well loved and I feel devastated by it as it was totally unexpected.....I know she'd want me to keep writing and I will but my heart and soul aren't quite in it this week...but to honor her I will finish and I will be published but....
this week I need to heal, to think, to honor her, to remember her and enjoy her life...
but I will be back and writing with a vengenace because that is what I want to do with my life...so that when I die I have no regrets...no well I should haves etc...

An epiphany.....

yep a lightbulb moment!!!
My writing has been CRAP this year!! Non existent or deleted as soon as I've written it. Trashed and rewritten over and over until I've been at a standstill. Even a fabulous trip to Reno and a writer's conference which motivated me no end and made me want to achieve success in myself and my writing didn't help....and THEN....
that lightbulb moment!!!!
I wasn't happy with what I was writing...not my writing as such...but the direction I was going in with it. I was trying to take the "easy" road :) as if getting into any sort of publishing is easy :) but my heart wasn't quite in it....and I am so happy to finally admit that to myself....that I wasn't writing what I really enjoy reading so how the hell could I enjoy writing it!!!!
I'm starting again with a new purpose in mind, new goals to achieve and most of my characters will be able to make that journey with me, they'll just do it with a lot more depth and another dead body thrown in here and there :) .
It felt like a great weight had been lifted off my shoulders, and although my journey to the land of publishing may take a little longer than I had hoped, I think I'll be much happier with the results in the end!!!!